coral:

I want you to think about me at night, when you can’t sleep and you look outside and see the stars. And think about the times we used to look at the night sky. I want you to remember all the fun we had. And then I want you to go to sleep knowing that somewhere in the world I can’t sleep either because I’m thinking too.

(via gosh)

Late night thoughts…

I love writing. I often forget this. I mean when people ask you what do you do in your spare time or do you have any interesting hobbies. I’m often stumped. This is because I have nothing. I actually do nothing apart from the social norm. I mean when I was in my teenage years I probably had more substance. Having just sat down and read through a decade worth of diaries this is very evident. Funnily enough it has taken me a decade to finally spell diary correctly as I often started many of my diary entries with “dairy”.  

Why did I not continue writing if not for a purely self healing basis. Nowadays words just seem to be jumbled in my mind and sometimes I’m unable to communicate concisely and effectively. I mean when I’m typing I’m able to process what I’m saying and I’m able to make sense of it.  When I reminisce of my childhood I picture warm summer nights, the smell of freshly cut grass and eternal family meets. I picture happiness, love and postitivy. I feel positive, I feel alive.

When I read back through my diaries I remember moments that I thought were once lost. I’m embodied with feelings I thought I had forgotten and memories that are attached with love, pain and sadness. The mind is a beautifully complex organ. The struggles and issues I had growing up ironically I still have now. Reading words from the past is beautifully nostalgic. If anything I’m such a stronger person today and I have no regrets.

I constantly dreamed of being something great. I dreamt of conquering all of my dreams travelling, having many loves, being successful, being happy and being myself.  If there is one thing I have learnt from my life, is that you simply cannot wait for greatness. You cannot assume that everything you have ever wanted will be there when you wake up. If I was to maintain this mindset for the rest of my life, I will never ever be content or happy.

Mindset. I guess that word sums up everything. How do you change mindset? A question I’ve always asked myself. I now know this is something that I need to adjust to move forward in life. But hey I guess its always easier to idenitify the solution to your problem. To actually implement the solution successfully and perpetually is another thing. However it has reached a time in my life where I think Im ready to do this. I need to stop worrying about all the small insignificant issues and focus on the goals in hand. There is no point worrying about things that you cannot change. I spend way too much time worrying about monotonous unimportant issues. This as a whole brings my whole being down and my demeanour changes. Its so hard to move focus onto positive energy when you have been one way for so long. I can’t keep always pretending that everything is okay. If I want my life to change and need to take it into my own hands and make movements.

I know the life I want, I know the person I want to be. I believe in myself and I know I will get there. It takes these moment of self realisation to flick an internal switch.  Imagine waking up with no worries or anxiety. Being in the moment and happy seeing the positive light and energy in everything you do and being happy with the your life and being you.